Akuma-Blocked
by RicardianScholar Clark-Weasley
Summary: You'd think with knowing each other's secret identities and now happily dating everything would be easy for Adrien and Marinette...you'd think wrong. Adrien and Marinette struggle to actually have a kiss as every date is interrupted by an Akuma attack. There is only so many non-kisses a girl could take before she snaps.
**Author's Note:** For Angela-the-neko, who had inspired this fic.

It was a beautiful, sunny, day in Paris. Perfect for a walk which, despite how boring it sounded, was what Adrien planned for his first date with Marinette. It might sound like a boring and cheap date but after having just discovered that his Lady was also his Princess, Adrien only ever wanted to _talk_ to her.

He wanted to find out every little thing about her, what makes her tick, what she likes, what she hates, and more importantly he wanted to ensure that comfortable way of bantering when he was Chat would seep into his relationship with her when he was Adrien. He wanted her to be at ease with him.

(Though he was not going to deny her stuttering and blushes were adorable.)

So far the date had been going brilliantly.

Adrien arrived bright and early to find that Marinette had most certainly not changed her mind (he had been petrified that any minute he'd get a text cancelling or Mr and Mrs Dupain-Cheng would turn him away from the front door) and looked beautiful in a summer dress which emphasised things that Adrien never really noticed before, and immediately turned him bright red as he coughed and stammered through his greetings.

It helped that Marinette was equally stutter-y and shy, and they awkwardly left the Dupain-Cheng bakery extremely aware that Mr and Mrs Dupain-Cheng was watching them until they turned off the street.

(Adrien could literally feel Mr Dupain's warning glare burn into the back of his neck but both Marinette and Tiki said he was being incredibly silly that Mr Dupain was nothing but a great big teddy bear…..Adrien has his doubts.)

"So…erm…..ah…." Adrien mumbled, "I hope you don't mind just a walk."

"Walking is fine!" Marinette squeaked. "I walk liking," she immediately burned a bright red as her eyes widened in horrified realisation. "I-I-I-I mean!" she stuttered hastily. "I walk. I mean! _I like to walk_!"

Marinette then let out a mortified groan as she covered her face with her hands. Adrien couldn't help it, it was just so cute and amusing, he chuckled. "You're so adorable," he told her unable to keep the smug look off of his face.

After all it was him, _Chat Noir_ , getting her, _Ladybug_ , all hot and flustered. He never thought he was going to succeed in that with all the rejections and brush-offs he had received in the past. So now knowing all it takes is _Adrien_ to smile at _Marinette_ was seriously doing wonders to his ego right now.

As if she could hear his smug look, Marinette looked up furiously. "Oh shut up!" she huffed.

"But My Lady!" Adrien protested innocently. "It's _such a breath of fresh air_ to have you so shy around me."

"Urgh!" Marinette grumbled. "You're so annoying."

"You love it really."

There was a moment of silence in which Adrien immediately freaked out. Had that been too strong? Did he put her off? Was this just a pity date and she was going to tell him that she really wasn't that interested? _Did he just ruin his date before the first five minutes had been up?!_

"Yeah," Marinette whispered shyly. Her cheeks were bright pink and her breathing was a little ragged as she tried to keep herself calm. "I do." Her hand then slipped into his and squeezed reassuringly. "But don't you dare let it go to your head, Kitty," she said warningly.

Adrien struggled to reply he was too busy focusing on the fact that she was holding his hand. It tingled pleasantly where her soft skin brushed his and he felt a flurry of butterflies flutter inside his stomach as he had to really fight the urge to jump for joy and cheer. "Wouldn't dream of it, Princess," he mumbled instead.

There was a beat of silence before Marinette aimed her most radiant and brilliant beam in his direction. "So…" she said, still a little nervous, "….played any good video games lately?"

And just like that Adrien got everything he wished for. They spent the entire date walking along the Seine discussing everything and anything under the sun with an ease and comfort that they only ever had as Chat Noir and Ladybug. Eventually the sun was beginning to set and they had almost exhausted themselves, Marinette paused as she rested against the railings and looked out at the view of the city in twilight.

"It's beautiful!" she breathed.

Adrien was too busy staring at Marinette to notice. He wasn't sure how he was supposed to admire beauty elsewhere when the light of the setting sun made Marinette's skin glow pink, her eyes shine like stars, and her hair look even more tempting to touch, just to see if it's as soft and silky as it looks, and she had that look of serenity and joy on her face that made her lips part temptingly….

"Not as beautiful as you," Adrien replied promptly.

And before Marinette could tell him off for being corny and cheesy and clichéd (as she had done so before with many of his jokes and puns) and definitely before Adrien could feel embarrassed, Adrien turned Marinette to face him and trailed his hands up her shoulders to caress her soft cheeks before he slowly leaned in and –

" **AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!** "

Marinette and Adrien leaped apart at the bloodcurdling scream and soon enough the usual explosions and insanity that followed an Akuma attack could be heard clearly from the city centre.

"Sorry Kitty," Marinette said regretfully, "but we'll have to resume this later. Duty calls. Tiki!" she cried out. " _Transform Me_!"

And with that Ladybug immediately swooped out of their date and right into danger. Adrien followed quickly with his own transformation and much to his frustration the battle lasted for two whole hours before they could safely purify the Akuma. Two incredibly intense hours that left them both exhausted and with a bleary, mumbled, goodbye, Adrien and Marinette parted before they could really finish their date.

Before they could even get their first kiss!

Adrien groaned disappointedly into his pillow as he swore bloody vengeance on Hawk Moth for ruining what would have been a perfect first date.

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It was their second date and Adrien was determined to get his kiss.

This time round Adrien fell on the boring fail-safe of going to the cinema. There had been many reasons as to why he had chosen the cinema such as it was something Marinette had actually really wanted to do, and that Plagg was less likely to complain about all the 'lovey-dovey-ness' if he had his mouth full of cheese popcorn, and that they were less likely to be attacked by an Akuma, but the main reason was that Adrien had seen enough romantic comedies and sitcoms to know that the movies were a perfect place to get a kiss.

(The only reason why Nino hasn't died of hysterical laughter from the sight of Adrien's DVD collection is because Adrien also had a pretty decent superhero/anime/action section that earned him back some 'cool points'.)

Adrien was really nervous at first. What if he didn't get his timing right? What if Marinette got put off by his sweaty palms and popcorn breath? (He decided to not eat the cheesy popcorn at this point and Plagg certainly appreciated being given his own seat with the large box of the stuff.) What if he somehow screwed this up and Marinette had to go to hospital with a broken nose? No, seriously, he heard that could happen.

Adrien took a deep breath (and almost choked on it he was so effing nervous!) before he reached out and took Marinette's hand.

Marinette smiled at him sweetly from the side and squeezed his hand affectionately. Adrien grinned back and together they settled back and began to watch the film. Throughout the first hour, Adrien kept glancing at Marinette who seemed entirely engrossed with the film and absolutely clueless to his intentions. He was soon able to screw up his Chat Noir courage to pull his hand away from hers, yawn, and the stretch his arm out to drape it over her shoulder.

He could have sworn he saw Marinette roll her eyes at that but it didn't stop her from resting her head on his shoulder and smiling up at him just as sweetly as before.

Adrien's heart skipped a beat.

He twisted his head so he could look into those beautiful, deep, blue eyes and unwittingly his eyes jumped down to her sweet, tempting, pink lips.

His heart skipped another beat.

Marinette tilted her head invitingly.

His heart must have stopped altogether.

Adrien leaned down and just as their lips were about to brush against one another –

An Akuma burst through the cinema screen.

Immediately the whole screen room went into total uproar. Everyone started screaming and scrambling to get out of their seats as the Akuma fired its attack at any innocent person. Reams of movie film wrapped round men, women, and children and tried to suffocate them.

"I AM SPOILER ALERT!" the Akuma bellowed. "HERE TO PUNISH ALL WHO RUIN MOVIES WITH THEIR TALKING AND CELL PHONES AND ANNOUNCING THE ENDING ON THE TOP OF THEIR VOICES!"

"You have got," Adrien growled furiously, "to be _kidding me_." He was so cross he couldn't even bring himself to make a pun at this point. Ladybug leaped out from beneath the chairs and furiously slammed her yoyo into the Akuma's face. "Plagg!" Adrien snarled. " _Transform Me_!"

"But!" Plagg whimpered pathetically. " _Cheesy popcorn_!"

"If I can't get my kiss with Marinette," Adrien snapped, "then you can't have your cheesy popcorn. Now, _Transform Me_!"

Plagg reluctantly did so and Chat Noir wasted no time whacking Spoiler Alert over the head with his baton. "Oi, Ugly!" he yelled out. The Akuma turned it's hideous, clownish, face towards him and he grinned his best Cheshire cat grin he could muster. "…Snape killed Dumbledore."

The Akuma screamed furiously.

For the rest of the evening many fans of Ladybug and Chat Noir will sit up on Ladyblog and discuss how Ladybug and Chat Noir seemed unnaturally vicious in this particular battle….they had no idea. Adrien was still spitting out curse words and insults about the victim three hours after the battle due to the fact as soon as it was over the Gorilla had whisked him home before he could even _look_ at Marinette let alone kiss her.

Curse him and his damn bad luck.

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The funfair was a great deal more exciting than the cinema. Marinette seemed to literally buzz with excitement and anticipation as they entered the fair, and Adrien had to admit he was rather dazzled by the lights and the music and the different stalls and rides to pick from.

He hadn't been in a fair for years and was suddenly overwhelmed with giddiness.

He would have to let Marinette plan their dates more often.

He blushed suddenly as he felt Marinette tug his arm so he leaned down to her level and her warm breath tickled against his ear. "What do you want to do first?" she asked loudly, having to shout a bit so she could be heard over the general noise of everyone and everything.

"I don't know," Adrien scanned the fun fair.

There was so much he wanted to do, toffee apples, the big roller-coaster, the games to win a stuffed toy, the candyfloss, the Ferris wheel, the other rides that swung you upside down and flung you all over the place, the fried food stand, the carousal, more food stalls, go carts, a fortune teller, a Tunnel of Lo….

Adrien grinned as he took in the great, big, pink, cheese-fest that was the funfair's Tunnel of Love. It was covered in cupids and love hearts and over corny romantic symbols. It looked like it would be cheesy as hell and that just made Adrien want to ride on it all the more.

He wasn't going to lie but holding hands with his Lady while riding a Tunnel of Love had always been one of his fantasies.

(There's a reason why Nino keeps telling Adrien he needs to stop watching so many romantic films.)

"My Lady," Adrien nudged Marinette lightly, "we should start with _that,_ " he nodded towards the Tunnel of Love.

He was already daydreaming about the slow, silly, ride and how corny and cheesy it'll be, and how he and Marinette would scoff, laugh, and giggle until they could barely breathe and end up in each other's arms and then -

Marinette had followed his gaze and immediately blanched at the sight, squashing his dreams instantly. " _God_ ," she groaned disgustedly, "not the Tunnel of Love! That's _so_ cheesy!"

" _Come on_ ," Adrien urged her in his most persuasive voice (he could literally see her knees buckling slightly as he deepened he voice like so), "it'll be fun."

"It's so _clichéd!_ " Marinette whined. "Soon you'll be telling me you want to go on the Ferris wheel and have a kiss on the very top as we look down at the whole world." Adrien flushed with humiliation at that. He wasn't going to lie he had been harbouring fantasies of doing exactly that. With fireworks being perfectly timed in the background. "Oh God," Marinette moaned miserably as she realised (by witnessing Adrien blush and sort of fold himself up with embarrassment) that she had hit the nail on the head exactly. " _Fine!_ " she threw her arms up in an 'I surrender' gesture. "We'll do the Tunnel of Love and the Ferris wheel and it'll be very romantic."

Adrien grinned excitedly. "Thank you, My Lady," he cried out unable to stop from sounding like a child on Christmas Day, "I promise-"

"But first!" Marinette interrupted sternly, a finger on his lips. His eyes instantly crossed as he focused on that pretty, little, dainty finger with its perfect crescent white tip. Just a single touch from her made him feel like there was explosives going off under every inch of his skin and yet at the same time he couldn't help but resent that that finger wasn't her lips. Marinette's eyes sparkled as if she knew what he was thinking and like it very much. "I'm going to win you a stuffed toy!" she declared.

Adrien couldn't help but feel challenged at that. It had been another hopeful dream of his to win Marinette a cute stuffed toy and earn a kiss for his efforts. "Not if I don't win you one first," he smirked his best, arrogant, Chat Noir, smirk, " _Princess._ "

Marinette's eyes sparkled all the more at that. "Wanna bet?" she retorted back defiantly.

"I certainly do," Adrien said confidently as he offered his hand out to her. "Loser has to buy winner whatever treat they want from the food stands."

Marinette took his hand. "Done," she agreed as she shook it.

Adrien immediately flipped it over and pressed a kiss on her knuckles which sent Marinette into one of her flustered states as they went in search of a game stall with stuffed toy prizes. He had hope to have the advantage at that point since he had to guide Marinette from walking into three stands, a clown, and about twenty people before they settled on a stall but she had snapped back to her battle-ready, cool and calm, Ladybug self and kept up with him through the entire shooting game they were playing.

The stall owner watched utterly gobsmacked as Adrien and Marinette were able to shoot down all the targets at the exact same time with the exact same super-speed which probably broke all records. He numbly handed Adrien and Marinette their prizes at the same time without a word.

Adrien and Marinette spun round in their seats and sheepishly swapped prizes. Marinette had won Adrien an over-stuffed, giant, Ladybug while Adrien had won her a black cat with neon green eyes.

(Yes, the stall they had chosen was Ladybug and Chat Noir themed, and yes, that was _exactly_ why Adrien had picked it.)

"I see we have tied," Adrien laughed sheepishly, "My Lady."

"So we have," Marinette agreed easily, "which means that there is no loser to buy the sweets. Oh well," she shrugged easily, her eyes bright, her cheeks red, and there was something rather anxious about her, "there's only one way to solve this one."

Adrien blinked dumbly. "Is there?"

Marinette bit her lip and nodded hastily and then - much to Adrien's never-ending excitement as his heart raced, his stomach twisted anxiously, and his hands twitched eagerly – she leaned in towards him, her feet slipped onto its tiptoes, as her lips got closer and closer to his, they were almost touching when….Marinette's eyes widened in horror. " **DUCK**!" she screamed as she suddenly tackled him to the ground.

Adrien didn't have time to ask what was wrong when a blast of pink light hit the stall owner and the poor man was suddenly waddling desperately and frantically as he was nothing but a ball of candyfloss where his torso used to be.

Adrien moaned pitifully. _No_ …..not _another_ Akuma attack, and he had been _so close_ to a kiss as well!

"EVERYONE SHOULD ENJOY UNHEALTHY FOOD!" the hideous corndog looking Akuma screeched. "HEALTH CODES ARE OPPRESSIVE ND HAVE NO PLACE IN A WORLD OF FUN! EVERYONE HAVE CANDYFLOSS!"

" _You have got to be kidding me_!" Marinette snarled furiously. "Is Hawk Moth just akumanising _any_ disgruntled person nowadays?!"

"It's beginning to feel like it," Adrien mumbled, "we better sort this out before we end up _toast._ "

"Adrien," Marinette pinched her noise, "toast isn't even served at a funfair."

"I couldn't think of another joke!" Adrien protested. "I was incredibly distracted."

"By _what?_!" Marinette said exasperatedly. Adrien raised an eyebrow at her as he flicked his eyes up and down her lovely form that was still pressed right up against his. "Oh," Marinette murmured quietly as her eyes widened and her cheeks went pink once more. " _Oh_!" she scrambled off of him quickly (much to his disappointment). "Enough of this! We're not letting our date end like this. We're defeating that Akuma, we're going to have a toffee apple, and we're going to have a fantastic date before it's time to go home."

But they didn't.

Even though they had defeated the Akuma and purified the poor soul quickly enough that hadn't changed the fact there had been health hazards and the funfair was instantly closed down (it had helped that Ladybug and Chat Noir had evacuated the fair during the battle) and before Adrien could suggest something else to do instead Alya swooped down and dragged Marinette off because, and Adrien quotes, 'Ladybug must still be around here and I need back-up to catch her on camera' abandoning her boyfriend, and Adrien's best friend, with Adrien.

So instead of ending his date with a lovely kiss from Marinette on the Ferris wheel overlooking all of Paris as fireworks went off…..Adrien ended his evening playing video games with _**Nino.**_

The worst bit is that it was still probably the best date they had so far….his life sucks.

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Call Adrien a hopeless romantic but he had always wanted the kiss at the front door after the date under the moonlight and stars. Which was why he held off on this particular date which was turning out to be a huge success. There had been no Akuma attacks during dinner, no mess ups in the restaurant, and Adrien hadn't put his foot in it all. Just easy conversation, sweet smiles, and really good food.

Adrien would be disappointed that their date was over if it wasn't for the fact he was too busy trying to not freak out the closer they got to Marinette's front door. His palms were sweaty (not that Marinette seemed to mind but then again that might be because hers was just as bad) and he struggled to keep his breathing straight as he fought to remember all the kissing tips he read in preparation for this night.

They reached the front door and turned round to face each other. Marinette smiled radiantly but nervously as she kept her eyes on Adrien's shoes. "I had a nice time tonight," she offered timidly.

"Me too," he replied.

He instantly kicked himself inwardly as the conversation died a horrible, quick, death and there was now an awkward silence between him and Marinette as they stared at each other with matching pink cheeks.

"So….erm…..well….." Marinette stammered as she tugged a pigtail nervously. " _This is me_!" she blurted out.

"Yes, so it is," Adrien agreed loudly. "Erm…..I will see you tomorrow, yeah?"

"Yeah," Marinette nodded shyly.

There was another moment of awkward silence as Adrien floundered over what he should do next. Should he reach out and hug her? Should he cup her face and lean in and kiss her? Should he lean in and hope she'll lean in too? _How does one initiate their first kiss?!_

"Oh for God sake!" Plagg snapped as he wriggled out from beneath Adrien's shirt collar. "Hurry up and _just kiss the girl_! I want to go home and eat my camembert!"

" _Plagg!_ " Tiki cried out irritably as she poked her own head out from Marinette's purse. "Shut up!" she hissed furiously.

"What?" Plagg blinked innocently. "They're being ridiculous. They're dating, they both like each other, and they obviously both want to kiss each other," Marinette and Adrien blushed more and more at each word Plagg uttered, "so why the hell wait and not just do it?!"

"Just do it?" Tiki repeated. " _Just do it?!_ Urgh! You're so hopeless and useless when it comes to romance. They don't just do it they need the right atmosphere which you had just ruined!"

"I did nothing of the sort!"

Marinette gigged slightly. "He has a point," she said calmly.

Plagg puffed out his chest proudly. "Of course I do!" he boasted.

"Shut up, Plagg." Adrien responded automatically while Tiki rolled her eyes. Plagg said something else and Tiki snapped at him for it but Adrien had no idea what they were bickering about now because Marinette had stepped closer towards him and her warm, soft, gentle hands were on his shoulders. He could hear his hear hammering in his ears as she tilted her head up and leaned in close. His eyes fluttered shut as he leaned in towards her and almost everything was amplified, the feel of her hands, her sweet scent, the sound of her breathing as she blew out a small puffs of warm air against his li-

The front door was suddenly wrenched open which sent both Marinette and Adrien flying sideways into the bakery. They would have crashed onto the floor if Mr and Mrs Dupain-Cheng hadn't caught them in time.

" _Whoops!_ " Mr Dupain said loudly as he helped Adrien stand up properly. "Sorry kids, we thought we heard someone arguing and got worried."

"Yes," Mrs Dupain-Cheng agreed loudly as she helped Marinette back onto her feet, "but now we realise we were mistaken. So don't mind us, carry on!"

They then stood there beaming encouragingly at Adrien and Marinette. Adrien wasn't sure about Marinette but he pretty much felt like he lost the will to _live_ let alone compute what his girlfriend's parents were actually saying.

" _Mum_!" Marinette hissed, bright pink and furious, " _Dad!_ "

"Yes, sweetie?" Mrs Dupain-Cheng asked in an innocently sweet voice. Marinette shot her a pointed look and her eyes widened with realisation. "Oh right!" she blushed lightly. "The door!"

And with that Mrs Dupain-Cheng slammed the door closed and left Marinette and Adrien to deal with another awkward atmosphere. Adrien was far too aware that Marinette's parents were stranding _right behind_ the door and could probably hear _everything_. With that in mind his palms instantly started to sweat again and he choked on his own spit as he tried to formulate a sentence.

"Screw it!" Marinette muttered to herself. "I'm not missing out on another _kiss_!"

She then grabbed Adrien by the collar of his shirt and hauled him down towards her. Her lips were mere centimetres away from his as he closed his eyes in anticipation and th-

" **AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH**!" Someone screamed hysterically a couple streets away. "AKUMA!"

Adrien didn't even get a chance to express his frustration as the front door the bakery was instantly opened and both he and Marinette were yanked in by the concerned and fearful Dupain-Chengs. Instantly, Marinette ran upstairs to her bedroom, dragging Adrien with her by the hand, but instead of doing anything Adrien had dreamt of doing in her bedroom (like video games or homework or cuddling up as they watched a movie or, you know, _snogging_ ), they transformed into their superhero identities and snuck out of the window to meet the Akuma.

It was the quickest battle they ever had (because God help them if Mr and Mrs Dupain-Cheng went up to check on them and found them missing) and they quickly ran back to the bakery and rushed back into Marinette's room just in time for Mrs Dupain-Cheng to tell Adrien his father was sending the Gorilla to pick him up.

She took one look at Adrien and Marinette's rumpled states, Adrien's hair stuck up all over the place and Marinette's was beginning to fall out of her pigtails, their inability to breathe normally, and their flushed faces, and smirked.

She probably thought that Adrien and Marinette had spent the entire Akuma attack making out in Marinette's bedroom…God, Adrien _wishes._

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The school dance was a total disaster.

They should have expected it. After all it was a school dance in a school where _Chloe_ went to. That guaranteed at least one Akumanisation.

But three was just taking the piss.

First, Chloe had upset the girl who was Head of the Decorating Committee by making a scathing comment on their choice of theme. This led to a long and difficult battle with a decorating obsessed Akuma in which they were almost suffocated to death with streamers, had dodged thousands of exploding balloons, and endured one humiliating scenario after another (Adrien wishes with a burning passion that he could convince Alya to take down the photo of him tied, upside-down, to a lamp-post in pink frilly streamers). By the time they finally purified the poor girl it was almost time for the dance, they had to race home quickly and get ready.

This meant, of course, that Adrien's dreams of a perfect school dance were already ruined as he had forgotten Marinette's corsage in his rush to get ready, there was no time for Mr and Mrs Dupain-Cheng to take photos, and Marinette (much to her never-ending mortification) hadn't been able to zip her dress up properly and hadn't noticed until Alya pointed it out.

"Hey," Adrien said gently as he nudged Marinette's cheek with his shoulder, "it's not that bad."

" _Yes it is_!" Marinette squeaked against his neck. He tried not to sigh blissfully at the sensation of her lips against his neck. "Everyone was able to see the back of my bra! They now know what sort of underwear I wear! They're probably all laughing about it right now!"

Adrien squeezed Marinette's waist comfortingly as he tried desperately to not think about Marinette's white polka-dotted pink frilly underwear. That was not the thought you were supposed to be pondering while slow dancing with your girlfriend in the middle of a school dance. "No one is laughing at you," he reassured her, "apart from Alya, Nino, and I, no one saw it. It's too dark in here."

Marinette looked up hopefully. "You think so?" she asked timidly.

"I _know_ so," Adrien said confidently. "Please cheer up, Princess," he pleaded with her, "We're on a date at the school dance. Here we are in a nicely decorated hall, with terrible food and a punch bowl that Kim is _definitely_ trying to spike," Marinette giggled but Adrien was perfectly serious he had seen Alix slap Kim's wrist five times in the last forty minutes each time he tried to pour something from his flask into the punch, "good company with our friends, nice music that we're slow dancing to," _awesome_ music actually, Nino had been thrilled when he had been given the DJ gig for the dance and spent all week looking for good slow songs that weren't too cheesy and clichéd (which meant he turned down _everything_ Adrien suggested), "what more could we want?"

And with that he twirled her under his arm and caught her by the waist. He was pleased to say that Marinette returned in his arms with a radiant beam.

"You're right," she murmured, her hands entwined round his neck as she toyed with the blonde locks that met with his shirt collar. "Well, _almost,_ " she drawled out slyly.

"Oh?" Adrien purred. "And what am I _not_ right about, My Lady?"

"There is more that we could want," her blue eyes darkened as he felt them slide over his face and gaze steadily at his lips. "I want more."

Adrien gulped nervously as he felt Marinette edge nearer and nearer to his lips until –

The hall doors exploded.

" _ **WHERE IS CHLOE BOURGEOIS**_?!" A female Akuma decorated in broken hearts screeched. "I WILL TEACH THAT HOMEWRECKING TART WHAT WILL HAPPEN WHEN SHE STEALS SOMEONE'S DATE!"

"Chloe did _what?_!"

"Of course she did," Marinette muttered darkly, "she couldn't go with you so she chose the next best thing and made everyone else miserable. It's _Chloe_."

Adrien growled wordlessly (they seriously needed to have words with his childhood friend before she akumanises the whole of Paris with her attitude) as he allowed Marinette to drag him under the food table so they could transform under the cover of the mass panic that latest attack caused. They managed to dispatch this Akuma with ease as all it took was getting the date to distract the Akuma and destroying the Akuma's corsage.

It was _getting away_ that was the problem as soon as Ladybug had fixed the school dance, Alya pounced on her and tried to get her and Chat Noir to stay (and dance while she recorded them) and it took a lot of running, dodging, and backing-up to finally lose her and transform back. Even then they couldn't enjoy the school dance as Chloe was now dateless, what with the young couple she had split up were now reunited, and was now making it her life mission to get between Adrien and Marinette.

"This is so not how I imagined my first school dance," Adrien pouted as Marinette passed him a cup of punch. He took a sip and immediately grimaced, it appeared Kim had finally been successful in spiking the punch though why he chose whiskey of all things Adrien will never understand. "I was hoping to actually dance with my girlfriend uninterrupted," he grumbled.

"ADRI-KINS!"

Marinette and Adrien both flinched at the sound of Chloe's voice. "How about we just slip away for a little peace and quiet?" Marinette suggested hastily.

"Sounds like a good idea."

And with that Adrien dumped his spiked punch, snatched up Marinette's hand, and dragged her out of the school hall before Chloe could catch up with them. Together they ran down the school hallways laughing.

They didn't get far before Adrien gave into his impulses and pushed Marinette against the lockers. He swooped down with the full intention to snog the living daylights out of her before anything else can happen when -

"IF I CAN'T GO TO THE SCHOOL DANCE THEN NO ONE ELSE CAN!"

Marinette let out a wail of despair as Adrien pulled away and growled furiously. " _You have got to be fucking kidding me_!" he snarled.

They transformed quickly and dashed back to the school dance to save everyone from another Akuma.

When the School Dance had been announced Adrien had fantasied slow dances with Marinette, having a laugh with his friends, and the night ending on a high as he danced with Marinette to the most romantic song and they leaned in for their first ever kiss….

Instead the night ended abruptly as everyone in the school swore they would never watch Carrie again, they were that traumatised, and Adrien, Marinette, Plagg, and Tiki all collapsed in near exhaustion and slept very deeply that night.

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An ice cream parlour should be a perfect date especially when one was sharing a hot fudge sundae with their Lady. Adrien must confess he always thought sharing food or drink was one of the most romantic things in films and TV, the most romantic scene in Disney? Lady and the Tramp sharing their spaghetti and meatballs. So sharing a milkshake or something with Ladybug had been on the top of his date idea list since he had first fallen for the superhero and now, after almost two months of dating, they were finally doing it.

The only way this date could get any better is if Adrien finally gets his kiss because _, Damnit_ , it has been _two months_ now!

The romance of the date died quickly when Adrien and Marinette got to the bottom of the sundae and there was only a spoonful of melted ice cream and fudge sauce left. The Tramp might have been able to act like a gentleman and give Lady the last meatball but Adrien found he couldn't bring himself to do the same when it came to the deliciousness of ice cream and chocolate.

The challenging glint in Marinette's eye suggested the same and they both leaned in and battled furiously with their spoons to get the last little bit.

Marinette let out a triumphant yell as she won the battle and instantly scooped the ice cream and fudge sauce gloop into her mouth. Adrien couldn't resist a smile as he noticed she managed to splatter some on the corner of her lips.

"Hey," he said gently, "You have a little bit of ice cream right here." He pointed at his own lips to where Marinette had ice cream on hers.

Marinette flushed instantly and Adrien fought against (and lost to) the urge to smirk at her adorable, pink, face that was covered in ice cream.

Marinette caught sight of his smirk and glowered, then, a dangerous, mischievous, gleam entered her eyes. It was the sort of gleam that usually ended an Akuma battle in their favour. "Hmmm," Marinette licked round her lips, completely missing the ice cream and sending Adrien's stomach plummeting to the ground as the sight of her pink tongue sent tingles all over. "Is it gone?" she asked innocently.

Adrien narrowed his eyes at her. Two could play at this game. "Nope," he said calmly, "still there." He licked his finger and revelled in the sight of Marinette's bluebell eyes widening. " _Here_ ," he purred in his best Chat Noir voice before he leaned over the table, "let me."

He then wiped the ice cream off with his finger and placed it back into his mouth. Marinette's breathing hitched as her mouth opened slightly and her blush deepened to a near red. Adrien grinned as stroked that little corner of her lips again before leaning in and –

 _BANG!_

The doors to the ice cream parlour blew up.

"I AM HEALTH FOOD!" the Akuma screeched. "DOWN WITH DISGUSTING SUGARY FOOD THAT ROT PEOPLE'S TEETH LIKE HOT FUDGE SUNDAES!"

Adrien just stared at the Akuma gobsmacked because…. _seriously?!_ Hawk Moth must seriously be scraping the barrel today.

" _Oh no he didn't_!" Tiki cried out as she flew out of Marinette's purse looking redder than usual with rage. "Marinette, let's prove this moron wrong!"

Marinette nodded her agreement as she transformed into Ladybug and leaped into battle. Adrien took a little bit longer to follow because he was a little preoccupied with bashing his head against the table.

Two months. He had been dating his girlfriend for over _two months_ and he _still_ hadn't kissed her. He had dated his girlfriend for two months and still hadn't _kissed_ her because an Akuma has interrupted every. Single. Effing. Time.

 _For two months!_

MLBMLBMLBMLBMLBMLBMLBMLB

They were playing games at Marinette's which was definitely not the most exciting date in the world, in fact Adrien wasn't even sure if it could be counted as date, but it should surely mean no Akuma attacks. And then maybe, just maybe, Adrien could finally kiss his girlfriend. He wondered what her lips would taste like, they look so pink and sweet that he was half convinced she'd taste like strawberries or a pink iced bun or some-

"YES!" Marinette jumped up onto the sofa and pumped a fist in the air. " **VICTORY**!"

"Wait," Adrien blinked, " _what?_!"

He had been so busy thinking about Marinette's lips that he completely forgot to pay attention to the game which meant Marinette beat him with such ease it was incredibly embarrassing.

Marinette was now doing a celebratory dance which involved rolling her hips in a very distracting manner. "I won! I won! Uhuh! I won! I won! Uhuh!" she sang smugly. "I won! I won! Uhuh! I won! I won! Uhuh! I wo- _EEK_!" unable to take it anymore Adrien had dropped the controller and tackled Marinette back onto the sofa. " _Adrien_!" she squealed as his fingers slipped up her shirt. " _No_!" she gasped. "Don't you da-ha!" she dissolved into giggles as Adrien tickled her sides and stomach. "Stop!" she wheezed. "God! _Stop!_ "

"Never!"

Adrien continued to tickle Marinette until she laughed so hard her eyes started to water and his wrists were beginning to ache. He paused to take in her flushed face, her breathless state, and the happy shine in her eyes. _God_ , he thought to himself for the millionth time today, _she's_ _ **so**_ _beautiful_.

"Adrien…."

The husky tone to Marinette's voice was invitation enough, Adrien leaned in and –

 **BOOM!**

Marinette and Adrien stared in horror as the newest Akuma literally blew up a hole in the Dupain-Cheng apartment. Adrien barely had time to comprehend what actually happened before Marinette suddenly kicked him off and transformed.

"I swear," he grumbled, "it's as if Hawk Moth has a kissing sensor or something."

"Don't be ridiculous," Plagg yawned lazily, "it's just a coincidence," he shot Adrien a sly, cheeky, glance, "or maybe it's your bad luck as Chat Noir."

"Oh shut up," Adrien growled, "and _Transform Me_!"

The battle went quickly and easily but unfortunately Adrien and Marinette weren't able to resume their activities as Mr and Mrs Dupain-Cheng had pulled them into a tight, smothering, group hug when they returned (having left with no note after an Akuma attack literally damaged the apartment had left Marinette's parents to assume the worst) and they refused to let them go until the Gorilla came to take Adrien home.

(And even then he had difficulty prying Mrs Dupain-Cheng off of Adrien.)

MLBMLBMLBMLBMLBMLBMLBMLB

They had now been on eighteen dates together. _Eighteen dates_! That was eighteen times that they had tried to kiss one another and suddenly an Akuma attacked out of nowhere. Almost _three months_ of dating and Adrien still has no idea what it's like to kiss Marinette.

And today was no exception. It was literally another date, another Akuma attack.

Adrien was beginning to get really sick of it and apparently he wasn't the only one. Never before has he seen Ladybug kick someone so viciously in the face as he had during this battle. Chat Noir barely had to lift a finger as Ladybug swiftly snatched up the item, broke it, and cleansed the soul with such a terrifying fury that he could feel shivers run up and down his spine.

Which was ridiculous because he hadn't done anything to deserve his Lady's wrath….yet.

"MIRACULOUS LADYBUG!"

Ladybug threw her Lucky Charm up in the air and as always Chat could feel the magic circle round Paris as it fixed everything that had been broken by the latest Akuma. Soon enough everything was back to the normal, the victim was kneeling on the floor with a dazed, confused, expression, and a little white butterfly was flying back to where it belongs. Chat Noir grinned and lifted his fist up for the customary fist bump.

"Mission Accomp- _hmmph!"_

And that was when Ladybug deviated from the script. Instead of chanting in unison with him as their knuckles tapped together as they always had done in the past, she tackled him right into the alleyway. Her hands on his collar, making his bell ring loudly, as she pinned him to the brick wall and stared up at him intently. Her beautiful blue eyes were so fierce as he swore she could see into his very soul.

Chat Noir gulped as he suddenly felt very hot. His palms sweated, his face burned uncomfortably, and he struggled to breathe normally let alone actually talk.

"M-m-m-my Lady?!"

" _Shut up_!" Ladybug snapped. "I'm so sick and tired of Akumas interrupting every fucking time we try and kiss!"

It was then he realised where she was going with this and his stomach sank a little. It wasn't that he _didn't_ want to kiss her. He did. Very much so. It was all he could think about these days and all he could dream about at night. Plagg was becoming very irritable because Adrien talked about nothing else than the shape, colour, and possible taste of Marinette's lips. ("If she doesn't taste like cheese then I don't want to know!") Adrien could no longer do anything properly anymore because all he could think about is what it would be like to finally kiss his girlfriend.

It was just that he wanted a far more romantic setting than an alleyway after a battle!

He had dreamt of moons and stars and romantic music to make the perfect setting as he took her in his arms (that weren't sweaty from battle) and gave her the best kiss of her life that will stay with her forever.

"So am I," he said gently, "but I don't think a dark, dank, and damp alleyway in the ideal place for a first kiss. Wouldn't you prefer w-?"

"Just shut up and kiss me before another Akuma decides to attack!"

"As you wish, My Lady," Chat Noir said in his best suave, flirty, drawl…..but then almost immediately Adrien reared his head and his nerves took over. Which mean instead of kissing her, he started to talk. "May I say that you are ravishingly beautiful today? The flowers of the gardens pale in comparison to your sweet s-"

"Oh for the love of God!" Ladybug interrupted impatiently. Chat Noir didn't get a single word out as she suddenly pulled him down to her level, slanted onto her tip-toes, and slammed her mouth over his. The kiss was short, fierce, and a breath-taking. When they parted Chat found it extremely difficult to breathe as his lips tingled, his heart skipped multiple beats, and something was doing the tango in his stomach. It was made a billion times worse when he soaked in the sight of Ladybug with swollen lips and a smouldering look in her eyes. "Less talking," she said huskily, "more kissing."

She didn't have to ask again.

He immediately swooped in for another kiss. It started simple, and sweet, and chaste but Ladybug wrapped her arms firmly round his neck and tilted her head just so that the kiss instantly deepened. Chat Noir groaned as he felt the tip of Ladybug's tongue press against his lips and instantly Ladybug dove in and took advantage of the opening.

 _Beep, beep! Beep, beep!_

As Ladybug explored the inside of Chat's mouth, his eyes rolled to a close and he moaned delightfully as his hands griped tightly at her waist and pulled her closer.

 _Beep, beep! Beep, beep!_

Ladybug finished the kiss with a loud gasp as her need to breathe kicked in. Chat Noir groaned in disappointment at the loss of her lovely, warm, sweet mouth but shuddered as he felt her hot breath against his neck. Ladybug chuckled, it was a deliciously husky and uncharacteristic laugh that sent shivers down his spine and made his skin tingle all over. He had no choice but to pull her closer, his hand tangled itself in her hair, and he forced her in for another kiss.

 _Beep, beep! Beep, beep!_

This time it was Ladybug's turn to moan and gasp as Chat Noir explored her mouth with his tongue. Her body was flush against his, her hands in his hair, and there was not a single millimetre between them….and yet still, he didn't think they were close enough.

 _Beep, beep! Beep, beep!_

He pulled back slightly so he could nibble on her bottom lip and then he pulled her lip between his teeth so he could suck on it lightly. He couldn't resist a smirk when it induced a knee-buckling, shoulder-gripping, and extremely loud gasp from her.

 _Beep, beep! Beep, beep!_

There was a bright flash of reddish white and greenish white light and instead of Ladybug's thick, battle-ready, suit, Adrien could feel the soft cotton of Marinette's shirt and even better the much softer, warmer, patch of skin as her shirt rode up beneath his grip. Marinette gasped her surprise as she felt his actual skin against hers and with another Chat Noir trademark smirk, Adrien suddenly switched them round and pinned her against the wall.

"Oh!" Marinette moaned as Adrien took advantage of the naked skin where her neck met her shoulder and sucked on it lightly. " _Adrien_!"

 **Clatter!**

Marinette and Adrien froze where they stood. Slowly, painfully so, Adrien lifted his head to meet Marinette's wide eyes and together they slowly turned to find a pale, shocked, Alya who stood in the alleyway, her mobile on the floor, as she held a shaky arm pointing at them. Her mouth opened and closed several times like a fish until finally she was able to croak;

"…. _Holy shit!"_


End file.
